It seems that every club and every article out there about friendship in college is either about making friends as a freshman or just how awesome their friends are approaching graduation. In reality, a lot of people not only move away from their “freshman year friends,” but sometimes realize they no longer fit with their current friends as they grow during their college experiences.
This may seem obvious but people are growing apart and growing close to people all the time. Maybe you are one of those people who are still close to their best friend from kindergarten, but most peoples’ closest friends are from their current stage in life. That being said, there seems to be a weird stigma in college that once you have your group of friends– named, group chat created, and steady weekend plans– that you can’t ever branch out.
You might be nice to the girl you are partnered up in lab with or your significant other’s friends, but your BEST FRIEND hasn’t really changed year to year. While I love my best friend, (Hey Jenny!), it does not make sense that you limit yourself to the friend group that you already have when college is all about growing, challenging yourself, and learning who you are. Keep your old friends, but make new ones too!
So if I’ve done my job, now you are at least considering having a new friend or at least grabbing dinner with that aforementioned lab partner. But how do you do it?
1. Start small. Everyone loves coffee or tea. Try asking someone to grab coffee with you. If you go to BC, check out Fuel!
2. Do an activity together. The most jarring part of making a new friend is WHAT WILL WE TALK ABOUT. You don’t want to talk about anything too serious, but you also don’t want to seem superficial or boring. While you should just be yourself, because no matter who you are you are amazing, doing an activity lessens the pressure to constantly talk. Try a paint class at the Paint Bar where you can have sangria and use your creative side.
3. Don’t put pressure on yourself to make them like you. The best friendships come naturally, and you don’t want to have to constantly wear a mask if this person actually does become your friend.
Check out the article on Her Campus Boston College too!